Sunday, October 30, 2005
This is the Jess story revised...
Jess
“One more shot, come on Kate, don’t wimp out on me yet!”
“Jess, we have a final in the morning.”
“Oh who cares? We’ve been doing nothing but studying all of college. We’re seniors. Live a little! Here, take this kamikaze and have some fun!”
Kate sighed and looked at her roommate, as usual Jess’s hair was disheveled and she was all dressed up ready to party. Kate looked down at her own button down shirt and jeans; she was still wearing her glasses and had no make up. She hadn’t exactly planned for a night out. However, what had begun as their celebratory round of drinks after their last class had turned into an all night affair. Everything with Jess usually turned into an all night affair. That was Jess’s motto, “why stop when you’re having fun?” It was great occasionally, but she always threw responsibility out the window. She looked at Jess holding the shot out to her. She was dancing along with a song playing on the jukebox. She really seemed like she had no care in the world. Kate laughed to herself as she realized that in the four years she had known Jess, she had never actually seen the girl stress about anything. She really did live life day by day. Finally she grabbed the shot from Jess’s hand and threw it back.
“Yay! These are our last days of college baby! Embrace them now cause soon they’ll be gone!”
“Oh boy I’ll be regretting this tomorrow I’m sure.”
“Don’t think about tomorrow, enjoy today, come on let’s go dance.” Jess grabbed Kate’s hand and dragged her out to the dance floor.
------------------------------------------------------------------
Jess rushed around her small apartment, trying to throw stuff into a ragged duffel bag on her bed. She grabbed a flesh colored thong, a black leotard, and tan high heeled tap shoes and shoved them in the bag. She stopped in front of the mirror and sloppily put some mascara on her eyes while gathering the rest of her makeup into a bag with her other hand. She finally had a gig tonight. When the knock came, she was right in the middle of struggling with the almost- broken zipper on her duffel bag. She stopped in her tracks and stared at it. When she didn’t answer right away, the person on the other side banged louder. Then a low, gravely voice called, "Jessica, there's no where to hide. You know we're just going to track you down anyway. It’s time to pay up. You and Steve are long overdue."
She tentatively walked to the door and opened it an inch, with the chain still attached.
"Steve's not here anymore. He left," she said.
"Ah, so he skipped town, huh? Not surprised, I knew that kid had no thread of decency. Well, too bad you're still here, and I still need my money. So, I guess you'll have to pay his debts too," the guy said.
"What?!? That's impossible; I don't have that kind of cash. You know that" she protested.
He suddenly reached forward and slammed his bulky frame into the door, breaking the flimsy chain. Jess went flying back from the force of impact. He lunged after her and cracked his fist across her face so hard she went slumping down the wall. He loomed over her menacingly as she lay cowering on the floor. "Too bad, find it. I've waited long enough, I need to get paid. You have till Wednesday and I better have that cash in my hand, or those pretty legs of yours will never dance a gig again.
"Wednesday? That's only two days...there's just no way," she sobbed.
He kicked her hard in the ribs and reached down then pulled her head up by her long, blonde hair so his face was right in hers. "Wednesday, or else," he said.
He dropped his hold on her hair and she went crashing back down to the floor where she slumped down and cried. He turned, fixing his pin striped suit collar and casually smoothing down his dark hair in her mirror before strutting to the door and closing it behind him as if nothing had just happened.
She lay there sobbing, curled up in a fetal position. Finally, she crawled over to her dressing table and pulled herself up to her knees to look in the mirror. Her face was already swelling up and her side was throbbing horribly. She knew there was no point in even showing up to her gig that evening. They would never let her on stage with her face looking this way and she was in no condition to dance, anyway, since she suspected that he had broken a rib. She reached up and lightly touched her bruised eye, wincing with the pain, oo yea; RJ certainly had done a number on her. He definitely meant business this time.
She reached to the back of the dressing table and pulled out a cherry wood music box. Opening it, she pulled out a small, cracked, smoky mirror and a bag of white
powder. She lightly tapped the bag and poured out two lines. Then she reached into her jeans pocket and pulled out a crumpled bill. After leaning over and snorting the two lines, she slowly felt the pain disappear. She slowly stood up and walked over to her desk where she sat down and pulled out a white sheet of paper and a pen. She sat there for a second, trying to find the right words in her muddled brain, then finally she put the pen to the paper and began to write,
Dear Kate,
Well it definitely has been awhile. I don't really know how to say this, I'm so sorry that our lives have gone in such different directions. I do want you to know that you have always been one of my best friends and one of the few people that understand me. However, I know you're not going to understand what I'm going to say right now. I'm killing myself tonight...
Jess
“One more shot, come on Kate, don’t wimp out on me yet!”
“Jess, we have a final in the morning.”
“Oh who cares? We’ve been doing nothing but studying all of college. We’re seniors. Live a little! Here, take this kamikaze and have some fun!”
Kate sighed and looked at her roommate, as usual Jess’s hair was disheveled and she was all dressed up ready to party. Kate looked down at her own button down shirt and jeans; she was still wearing her glasses and had no make up. She hadn’t exactly planned for a night out. However, what had begun as their celebratory round of drinks after their last class had turned into an all night affair. Everything with Jess usually turned into an all night affair. That was Jess’s motto, “why stop when you’re having fun?” It was great occasionally, but she always threw responsibility out the window. She looked at Jess holding the shot out to her. She was dancing along with a song playing on the jukebox. She really seemed like she had no care in the world. Kate laughed to herself as she realized that in the four years she had known Jess, she had never actually seen the girl stress about anything. She really did live life day by day. Finally she grabbed the shot from Jess’s hand and threw it back.
“Yay! These are our last days of college baby! Embrace them now cause soon they’ll be gone!”
“Oh boy I’ll be regretting this tomorrow I’m sure.”
“Don’t think about tomorrow, enjoy today, come on let’s go dance.” Jess grabbed Kate’s hand and dragged her out to the dance floor.
------------------------------------------------------------------
Jess rushed around her small apartment, trying to throw stuff into a ragged duffel bag on her bed. She grabbed a flesh colored thong, a black leotard, and tan high heeled tap shoes and shoved them in the bag. She stopped in front of the mirror and sloppily put some mascara on her eyes while gathering the rest of her makeup into a bag with her other hand. She finally had a gig tonight. When the knock came, she was right in the middle of struggling with the almost- broken zipper on her duffel bag. She stopped in her tracks and stared at it. When she didn’t answer right away, the person on the other side banged louder. Then a low, gravely voice called, "Jessica, there's no where to hide. You know we're just going to track you down anyway. It’s time to pay up. You and Steve are long overdue."
She tentatively walked to the door and opened it an inch, with the chain still attached.
"Steve's not here anymore. He left," she said.
"Ah, so he skipped town, huh? Not surprised, I knew that kid had no thread of decency. Well, too bad you're still here, and I still need my money. So, I guess you'll have to pay his debts too," the guy said.
"What?!? That's impossible; I don't have that kind of cash. You know that" she protested.
He suddenly reached forward and slammed his bulky frame into the door, breaking the flimsy chain. Jess went flying back from the force of impact. He lunged after her and cracked his fist across her face so hard she went slumping down the wall. He loomed over her menacingly as she lay cowering on the floor. "Too bad, find it. I've waited long enough, I need to get paid. You have till Wednesday and I better have that cash in my hand, or those pretty legs of yours will never dance a gig again.
"Wednesday? That's only two days...there's just no way," she sobbed.
He kicked her hard in the ribs and reached down then pulled her head up by her long, blonde hair so his face was right in hers. "Wednesday, or else," he said.
He dropped his hold on her hair and she went crashing back down to the floor where she slumped down and cried. He turned, fixing his pin striped suit collar and casually smoothing down his dark hair in her mirror before strutting to the door and closing it behind him as if nothing had just happened.
She lay there sobbing, curled up in a fetal position. Finally, she crawled over to her dressing table and pulled herself up to her knees to look in the mirror. Her face was already swelling up and her side was throbbing horribly. She knew there was no point in even showing up to her gig that evening. They would never let her on stage with her face looking this way and she was in no condition to dance, anyway, since she suspected that he had broken a rib. She reached up and lightly touched her bruised eye, wincing with the pain, oo yea; RJ certainly had done a number on her. He definitely meant business this time.
She reached to the back of the dressing table and pulled out a cherry wood music box. Opening it, she pulled out a small, cracked, smoky mirror and a bag of white
powder. She lightly tapped the bag and poured out two lines. Then she reached into her jeans pocket and pulled out a crumpled bill. After leaning over and snorting the two lines, she slowly felt the pain disappear. She slowly stood up and walked over to her desk where she sat down and pulled out a white sheet of paper and a pen. She sat there for a second, trying to find the right words in her muddled brain, then finally she put the pen to the paper and began to write,
Dear Kate,
Well it definitely has been awhile. I don't really know how to say this, I'm so sorry that our lives have gone in such different directions. I do want you to know that you have always been one of my best friends and one of the few people that understand me. However, I know you're not going to understand what I'm going to say right now. I'm killing myself tonight...
Growing Up
By: Joyana Peters
Every summer growing up my family went down to visit our family friends in Virginia. Their son Paul and I had grown up together as children in New York, and then they moved away when we were about 9 years old. Paul and I remained friends over the years and kept in touch through letters. As time went by our relationship changed, as gradually we hit puberty and began to see each other for the boy and girl that we were becoming. There was one summer in particular that has always stuck in my mind.
I was about 13 years old that summer; my family went down to visit for the 4th of July. The families decided to go to a barbeque over by another farm nearby. We all piled into two cars. I sat in between Paul and his little sister, Melanie. Paul and I talked about what had been happening in school, how different this year had been at junior high and how hard our finals were. Melanie kept trying to get me to play Barbies with her. I tried not to be mean, but she was being so annoying. We finally got to the barbeque and we all spread out and did our own thing. The parents went off and started drinking with the other adults. Meanwhile, Paul and I began our usual game of the last couple of summers, “trying to ditch the little kids”.
There was a brook that ran through the property; Paul said it was really cool because it led up to a dam at the end after a good fifteen minute walk. We decided to walk it, knowing that our tagalong siblings would be too scared to follow us into the woods. The woods were cool and damp and there was a nice breeze that blew through the trees. I felt goose bumps pop up on my uncovered arms. As we walked it began to get darker as dusk slowly settled on top of us. We carried little glass jars with us to catch fireflies later. As we walked through the woods, the ground beneath us slowly began to slope up as we began to climb up a hill towards the dam. Faraway in the distance we began to hear the noise of running water, signaling that we were getting closer. The sun began to droop in the sky and hide behind the branches of the large trees making funny, shadowy outlines of the leaves on the ground in front of our toes.
Along the way Paul pointed out different plants, explaining their names and differences to me. I made fun of him, telling him, that he was beginning to sound more and more like a country boy to me. As it got darker it became harder to see as we climbed our way through the tricky path. I stumbled over a root and Paul caught me by the arm. His hand slowly slid down my arm and he began to hold my hand. We continued walking that way the rest of the way to the dam; sweaty hands clasping each other’s, trying to match each other’s strides, nervously trying to anticipate what came next.
Finally, we reached the dam and sat down on the ground next to it. It was beautiful. The stars were out in the sky and unlike home in New York there were no buildings here to block the view. We laid down on our backs in the tall, green grass and could see the navy blue sky stretched out for miles with gorgeous little diamond speckles decorating it. It was one of the most beautiful moments I have ever experienced in my life. As we laid there Paul began to point out some of the constellations, “See over there? That’s the Big Dipper. And over there? They call that Orion’s Belt.” As he talked, I noticed that slowly he was inching closer and closer to me. I smelled Doritos and hot dog on his breath. Suddenly, my face was facing his. We laid there looking at each other for a couple of seconds. I noticed an ant climbing a piece of grass next to my face. Finally, he leaned in and I felt his warm lips closing in over mine in a wet kiss. As he pulled away I felt my lips curl into an uncontrollable smile. It was perfect. Then he turned away, immediately embarrassed. “So, uhm I guess we should probably head back right?” he asked. “Yea they’ll probably be looking for us,” I answered. We stood up and brushed ourselves off and began to head back to the others.
As we headed back into the dark woods, I felt a funny tumbling in my stomach. A firefly flew past my face, but I didn’t open up my jar and try to catch it. I looked over at Paul, but he seemed deep in his own thoughts as we carefully found our way down the trail. I tossed my hair and tried to start swaying my hips to look cute as I walked; instead I ended up throwing off my balance and tripping over my own two feet and stumbling. Paul grabbed my arm once again, and the two of us stopped there in the middle of the trail. We stood like that for a couple of seconds, Paul clutching my arm, the two of us looking at each other waiting for the other to speak.
“I guess I should have worn sneakers today.”
“Yea those sandels aren’t good for this trail.”
I nodded and waited for him to say something else, instead he just reached down for my hand again and we began to make our way back to the barbeque clutching each other’s hands hoping that somehow the answers would miraculously appear.
By: Joyana Peters
Every summer growing up my family went down to visit our family friends in Virginia. Their son Paul and I had grown up together as children in New York, and then they moved away when we were about 9 years old. Paul and I remained friends over the years and kept in touch through letters. As time went by our relationship changed, as gradually we hit puberty and began to see each other for the boy and girl that we were becoming. There was one summer in particular that has always stuck in my mind.
I was about 13 years old that summer; my family went down to visit for the 4th of July. The families decided to go to a barbeque over by another farm nearby. We all piled into two cars. I sat in between Paul and his little sister, Melanie. Paul and I talked about what had been happening in school, how different this year had been at junior high and how hard our finals were. Melanie kept trying to get me to play Barbies with her. I tried not to be mean, but she was being so annoying. We finally got to the barbeque and we all spread out and did our own thing. The parents went off and started drinking with the other adults. Meanwhile, Paul and I began our usual game of the last couple of summers, “trying to ditch the little kids”.
There was a brook that ran through the property; Paul said it was really cool because it led up to a dam at the end after a good fifteen minute walk. We decided to walk it, knowing that our tagalong siblings would be too scared to follow us into the woods. The woods were cool and damp and there was a nice breeze that blew through the trees. I felt goose bumps pop up on my uncovered arms. As we walked it began to get darker as dusk slowly settled on top of us. We carried little glass jars with us to catch fireflies later. As we walked through the woods, the ground beneath us slowly began to slope up as we began to climb up a hill towards the dam. Faraway in the distance we began to hear the noise of running water, signaling that we were getting closer. The sun began to droop in the sky and hide behind the branches of the large trees making funny, shadowy outlines of the leaves on the ground in front of our toes.
Along the way Paul pointed out different plants, explaining their names and differences to me. I made fun of him, telling him, that he was beginning to sound more and more like a country boy to me. As it got darker it became harder to see as we climbed our way through the tricky path. I stumbled over a root and Paul caught me by the arm. His hand slowly slid down my arm and he began to hold my hand. We continued walking that way the rest of the way to the dam; sweaty hands clasping each other’s, trying to match each other’s strides, nervously trying to anticipate what came next.
Finally, we reached the dam and sat down on the ground next to it. It was beautiful. The stars were out in the sky and unlike home in New York there were no buildings here to block the view. We laid down on our backs in the tall, green grass and could see the navy blue sky stretched out for miles with gorgeous little diamond speckles decorating it. It was one of the most beautiful moments I have ever experienced in my life. As we laid there Paul began to point out some of the constellations, “See over there? That’s the Big Dipper. And over there? They call that Orion’s Belt.” As he talked, I noticed that slowly he was inching closer and closer to me. I smelled Doritos and hot dog on his breath. Suddenly, my face was facing his. We laid there looking at each other for a couple of seconds. I noticed an ant climbing a piece of grass next to my face. Finally, he leaned in and I felt his warm lips closing in over mine in a wet kiss. As he pulled away I felt my lips curl into an uncontrollable smile. It was perfect. Then he turned away, immediately embarrassed. “So, uhm I guess we should probably head back right?” he asked. “Yea they’ll probably be looking for us,” I answered. We stood up and brushed ourselves off and began to head back to the others.
As we headed back into the dark woods, I felt a funny tumbling in my stomach. A firefly flew past my face, but I didn’t open up my jar and try to catch it. I looked over at Paul, but he seemed deep in his own thoughts as we carefully found our way down the trail. I tossed my hair and tried to start swaying my hips to look cute as I walked; instead I ended up throwing off my balance and tripping over my own two feet and stumbling. Paul grabbed my arm once again, and the two of us stopped there in the middle of the trail. We stood like that for a couple of seconds, Paul clutching my arm, the two of us looking at each other waiting for the other to speak.
“I guess I should have worn sneakers today.”
“Yea those sandels aren’t good for this trail.”
I nodded and waited for him to say something else, instead he just reached down for my hand again and we began to make our way back to the barbeque clutching each other’s hands hoping that somehow the answers would miraculously appear.
America’s New Women
By: Joyana Peters
In a dimly lit room, girls are dancing on stage in sexy outfits. The girls wink and smile at the admiring men sitting below them on the floor as they stick money in their thongs. Cocktail waitresses strut around the room taking drink orders and flirting with customers. Rowdy catcalls come from the back of the room as appreciative women express their interest? No, there are no men up on the stage at this strip club these are just a group of women out with their girls appreciating what a sexy woman can do. In a new trend sweeping across the nation strip clubs now find a good percentage of their clientele to be women. Some come with their husbands or boyfriends to take part in the “foreplay” action making it a joint sexual fantasy experience, while others come in groups to appreciate the liberated sexual woman.
Cities have supported the trend by opening up female only sex clubs and beginning Ladies’ Nights at strip clubs now. A new type of club experience is opening up as well. Known as a 60/40 club, the club divides itself into sections to offer an atmosphere of 60% entertainment along with 40% restaurant making it the perfect date place for these new “liberal” couples. The Riviera Club located in Astoria, Queens, once known as the gay club, Krash, is a successful example of this new type of strip club. With many of its old customers still returning, it is known for its laidback, accepting attitude. An increasingly large percentage of their customers are now women. They say they enjoy going because the atmosphere is not as stuffy or expensive as some of the more well-known strip clubs in the city. You can just go kick back and relax and enjoy the action.
Across the country this phenomenon is continuing to take root and becoming more accepted and even considered popular. New York City’s Scores now boasts celebrity clientele such as Naomi Campbell, Courtney Love, and Robin Wright Penn. America can finally admit that women can enjoy their bodies and by attending strip clubs they are embracing their sexuality and having fun by taking part in an open experience.
This new activity has spurred all kinds of controversy as to why women like to go and watch other women take their clothes off. How is it fun for them? For the most part there seems to be a division of two main competing opinions. The one opinion mainly explains the women that go with their significant other, these people argue that women really do not get turned on by watching the female strippers but are there just to keep tabs on their men or to try and understand what their man gets out of attending. These people may argue that any feelings the strippers do conjure up in a woman are just sexual feelings at taking part in the fantasy with their significant other or they get aroused at watching their significant other getting aroused.
The other argument mainly explains the groups of women going together, these people say that these women are not really straight but are just acting out bisexual or lesbian tendencies. This speculation also stirs up the argument that everyone has some bisexual tendencies or curiosities but most never speak of it. Psychologists defend this argument by giving the example how all women check each other out as they walk by in their clothes or how women compare boobs. An example for men is how they feel the need to check each other’s packages out in the gym locker room. Some say it is a physical insecurity causing them to do this, but others argue it is the bisexual curiosity making them look.
Whatever is the cause of this newfound popular activity, it is now being practiced, and growing with time. This goes along with the general new American rising trend of a more liberal outlook on sex. With hit shows like Sex and the City, Desperate Housewives, Friends, and Will and Grace, it is becoming popular to discuss sex in a more open, accepting way. Sex and the City tackled many controversial topics and finally portrayed real-life women who embraced their sexuality and single lifestyle.
Riding the wave of this newfound liberal attitude are entrepreneurs introducing women’s sex toys, women’s porn, pole dancing lessons, strip tease lessons, sex museums and many other ways to encourage women to open up sexually. This newfound open motto is telling women it is finally okay to admit that you enjoy sex. You no longer have to pretend that you just have sex with your husbands behind closed doors to make babies. Women’s magazines are now devoting full sections on ways to enjoy yourself in the bedroom, giving advice on things from finding your g-spot to new positions to spice up your sex life. So whether you want an open environment to watch half-naked men and women dance, or you want to learn how to pole dance to turn on your partner we are lucky enough that new opportunities are offered each day to feel more sexy and alive. Isn’t it a great time to be a woman?
By: Joyana Peters
In a dimly lit room, girls are dancing on stage in sexy outfits. The girls wink and smile at the admiring men sitting below them on the floor as they stick money in their thongs. Cocktail waitresses strut around the room taking drink orders and flirting with customers. Rowdy catcalls come from the back of the room as appreciative women express their interest? No, there are no men up on the stage at this strip club these are just a group of women out with their girls appreciating what a sexy woman can do. In a new trend sweeping across the nation strip clubs now find a good percentage of their clientele to be women. Some come with their husbands or boyfriends to take part in the “foreplay” action making it a joint sexual fantasy experience, while others come in groups to appreciate the liberated sexual woman.
Cities have supported the trend by opening up female only sex clubs and beginning Ladies’ Nights at strip clubs now. A new type of club experience is opening up as well. Known as a 60/40 club, the club divides itself into sections to offer an atmosphere of 60% entertainment along with 40% restaurant making it the perfect date place for these new “liberal” couples. The Riviera Club located in Astoria, Queens, once known as the gay club, Krash, is a successful example of this new type of strip club. With many of its old customers still returning, it is known for its laidback, accepting attitude. An increasingly large percentage of their customers are now women. They say they enjoy going because the atmosphere is not as stuffy or expensive as some of the more well-known strip clubs in the city. You can just go kick back and relax and enjoy the action.
Across the country this phenomenon is continuing to take root and becoming more accepted and even considered popular. New York City’s Scores now boasts celebrity clientele such as Naomi Campbell, Courtney Love, and Robin Wright Penn. America can finally admit that women can enjoy their bodies and by attending strip clubs they are embracing their sexuality and having fun by taking part in an open experience.
This new activity has spurred all kinds of controversy as to why women like to go and watch other women take their clothes off. How is it fun for them? For the most part there seems to be a division of two main competing opinions. The one opinion mainly explains the women that go with their significant other, these people argue that women really do not get turned on by watching the female strippers but are there just to keep tabs on their men or to try and understand what their man gets out of attending. These people may argue that any feelings the strippers do conjure up in a woman are just sexual feelings at taking part in the fantasy with their significant other or they get aroused at watching their significant other getting aroused.
The other argument mainly explains the groups of women going together, these people say that these women are not really straight but are just acting out bisexual or lesbian tendencies. This speculation also stirs up the argument that everyone has some bisexual tendencies or curiosities but most never speak of it. Psychologists defend this argument by giving the example how all women check each other out as they walk by in their clothes or how women compare boobs. An example for men is how they feel the need to check each other’s packages out in the gym locker room. Some say it is a physical insecurity causing them to do this, but others argue it is the bisexual curiosity making them look.
Whatever is the cause of this newfound popular activity, it is now being practiced, and growing with time. This goes along with the general new American rising trend of a more liberal outlook on sex. With hit shows like Sex and the City, Desperate Housewives, Friends, and Will and Grace, it is becoming popular to discuss sex in a more open, accepting way. Sex and the City tackled many controversial topics and finally portrayed real-life women who embraced their sexuality and single lifestyle.
Riding the wave of this newfound liberal attitude are entrepreneurs introducing women’s sex toys, women’s porn, pole dancing lessons, strip tease lessons, sex museums and many other ways to encourage women to open up sexually. This newfound open motto is telling women it is finally okay to admit that you enjoy sex. You no longer have to pretend that you just have sex with your husbands behind closed doors to make babies. Women’s magazines are now devoting full sections on ways to enjoy yourself in the bedroom, giving advice on things from finding your g-spot to new positions to spice up your sex life. So whether you want an open environment to watch half-naked men and women dance, or you want to learn how to pole dance to turn on your partner we are lucky enough that new opportunities are offered each day to feel more sexy and alive. Isn’t it a great time to be a woman?
Tuesday, September 06, 2005
And That’s How it Began
“So where are we putting these pictures?” My little sister held up a picture of my parents when they were young.
“Just put them with the ones from when they were still dating.”
“Here?” She asked adding it to the already building collage.
“Yeah that works.” I looked at the growing collage and adjusted a picture on the end. “I can’t believe they’ve been married for 25 years already.”
“Yeah, they still look so young.” She said applying glue to the back of a picture.
“Well they got married young.”
“Why how old were they when they got married?” She asked picking up my parents’ wedding picture to get a closer look at their faces.
“21 and they got engaged when they were 18… Wow they were my age. That’s scary. I’m not even remotely at that point yet. Can you imagine me engaged?”
Definitely not,” she said snorting through laughter. “But times have changed since back then. I mean Mom didn’t even consider going away to college and dad didn’t even finish.”
“That’s not true. Mom was going to go away, and then she decided not to for dad.” I corrected her. “Didn’t you ever hear the story of how they got together? Mom changed a lot of her plans for dad.”
“Really? I don’t think I would ever change my plans for a guy,” My sister said matter of factly.
“Well you might sing a different tune if you were in love. You’re too young to know what it’s like when you’re in love. Your entire life can be turned upside down.”
“Oh cause you’re such an expert on love.”
“I didn’t say I was an expert, but I’ve heard their story, and that’s enough for me to know that love is out there and I want that kind of love one day. And it couldn’t have been all bad if they’re still together 25 years later….”
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Come on it’s just a carnival. Your boyfriend is out at sea; he can’t possibly expect you to sit in every night that he is away. Just friends, Scout’s Honor,” he said holding up his three fingers.
“Were you ever even a boy scout?” she asked with a laugh.
“Well no, but I still mean it just the same,” he said blushing.
“Oh alright, but just as friends,” she said shaking her head.
“Great, I’ll pick you up at 7.” He said and scampered away with the broom before their manager came back around. She stood at the counter and pondered over what she had just agreed to. Her boyfriend, Jim, and she had been together for over a year. He was a Kings Point merchant marine and he was away at sea for six months now. She knew that he would in fact be angry and would not understand that it was just a carnival if he knew she was going out tonight, yet there was something about the eager stock boy with the floppy brown hair.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Ooh I never knew mom had another boyfriend when she met dad.” My sister said mischievously. “That adds a whole added layer to the love story.”
“Yes it does, and if you can shut up I can continue telling the story.”
“Geez I was just saying, you don’t have to be so mean about it.”
I rolled my eyes and sighed. Little sisters could be so annoying.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Janet, that kid is here to pick you up!”
“Okay daddy, I’ll be right down!” She took one last glance in the mirror. Perfect, she looked good but not too good. Just right for a girl going out with a boy as friends while her boyfriend was away. The doorbell rang.
“Good evening, Mr. Vollmer, my name is Bob Peters, is Janet ready?”
“She has a boyfriend you know. A nice, respectable military man.”
“Yes sir, I am aware of that, and I’m not trying to move in while he is away. I’m just friends with your daughter.”
“Times are changing, boys and girls going out as friends, respectable boys having their girls escorted out unsupervised behind their backs. What’s the world coming to?”
“Dad, stop! We’re just going to a carnival. Alright, good night.” She rushed down the stairs and pushed past him out the door to where Bob still stood on the front stoop. He smiled at her as they walked down the steps together and over to where his rusty blue car was parked by the curb.
“We’re meeting some of my friends there is that okay?”
“Yea sure.”
They walked into the carnival and met up with some of Bob’s friends. They decided to walk over to the Ferris wheel together and along the way she saw some huge stuffed animals.
“Aw look at those, they’re so cute!”
“Here I’ll try to win you one.”
Bob stepped up to the carnival game and paid the attendant. Then he took the basket ball and aimed for the hoop and made it on the first shot. She stood next to him jumping up and down in excitement. He took the huge stuffed animal and held it out to her. As she stood there and looked at his big blue eyes and cute dimples she felt a stirring deep inside. He was completely different from Jim; he was young, and silly, yet adorable and sweet. Jim was always so serious and methodical. He would never take her to someplace like a carnival.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“So was that it? Did she just dump the other guy and go for dad?” my sister asked engrossed in the story now. She was curled up on the floor with her head resting on her hands.
“Well it wasn’t that simple. She had been dating Jim for awhile and he was a good guy, plus grandma and grandpa loved him.”
“So what did she do?”
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
It was the senior prom and Jim was finally home from sea. He was due to pick her up any second. As she stood in front of her mirror and looked at herself, a strange feeling came over her. She hadn’t seen her boyfriend in over eight months; she should be excited to see him. But she wasn’t.
As she fixed her dress she thought about the last time she had seen him. She had been desperately in love with him. She had been practically planning the wedding back then. Now she had this unsettled feeling of uncertainty when she thought of him. He had been the more distant, non-committal one back then. More recently, however, his letters had become more serious and focused on the future. She, however, had been spending more time with Bob. They still were “just friends” but they saw each other almost every day at work and had built a wonderful connection. She was a little confused.
“Janet, Jim is here!” Her mother stood at the bottom of the stairs with the camera, and there was Jim, looking incredibly handsome in his uniform, clutching a bouquet of flowers. The prom was perfect from a superficial standpoint. Jim was the perfect date, he socialized with her friends, he paid plenty of attention to her, he danced to every slow song with her and afterwards he asked her to take a walk in the courtyard outside the prom.
It was a warm night with a clear sky. The stars shone brightly down around them. She stood by one of the benches with her back to him when he came up behind her and put one hand on her waist while he leaned over and kissed her neck.
“I’ve missed you so much.”
“Well, I missed you too,” she said turning around to face him. She stood there and looked into his warm, brown eyes.
“Can you sit down a second? I got something for you.” She spread her skirt out carefully and sat down on the bench. Then Jim got down on one knee in front of her and opened up a small velvet box.
“Janet, I’ve spent the last eight months thinking only about how soon I could get back to you. Will you please come out to Ohio with me and meet my family and agree to become my wife?” She stared at him in shock, and tried to focus on what he was saying. Ohio? Wife? What should she say?
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Wow! A proposal from another man? What did she say?” my sister asked in shock. She obviously was impressed with this new knowledge of my mother’s life.
“Well what do you think she said silly? Obviously she didn’t say yes if we’re here.”
“But how did she know? What made up her mind?” my sister demanded more details.
“She always described it as just a feeling inside. She knew that it wasn’t right. Jim just didn’t give her butterflies. And she couldn’t see herself leaving New York.”
“So when did her and dad finally get together?”
“Let me finish will you? You’re so impatient, it ruins the story.”
“Well you’re taking too long to get to the good part.”
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Seven months later she was standing on the corner of Central Park South (59th Street) near Central Park. It was a chilly, but clear evening. There was the smell of chestnuts roasting, and the festive air of Christmas in the city. There were wreaths hanging everywhere and lights in the trees. The sound of carolers in the park drifted out to the streets. She stood there, bundled up in a big coat, and smiled to herself, and then she felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned around and there was Bob standing there, smiling.
“Okay, I got the driver to give us a ride around the park. Come on, get in.” He took her hand and walked her over to a beautiful white carriage. He helped her climb in and then climbed in under the blanket next to her. As the driver pulled away from the curb it began to snow gently. They slowly drove down the street towards the entrance of Central Park. As they began to round the corner by the skating rink, Bob started searching for something under the blanket. Suddenly, he pulled out two plastic champagne glasses and a small bottle of champagne.
“How did these get under here?” He asked unconvincingly with a twinkle in his eye. She started to laugh.
“You are too much. I can’t believe you staged this all.”
“Well I wanted this to be a memorable occasion.” He popped the cork and sent it flying out into the park. He poured them two glasses and began to give a toast.
“Wait there’s something else under here.” He reached under the blanket again, and this time pulled out a small jewelry box. He held it out to her and opened the lid. She gasped and put her hand to her mouth.
“Oh Bob.” He took her hand and looked her in the eyes.
“Janet, will you marry me?”
“Oh yes, yes I will!” She always describes it as a perfect moment, topped with a perfect kiss in a carriage ride around Central park, with a plaid blanket over their legs and snow cascading down on them. She says it was a moment perfectly thought out in a loving way that would be treasured forever and often retold.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“And it has been,” My sister said.
“Yup, it’s that perfect romantic story that you never believe happens in real life.”
“I can’t believe dad really did that. It’s just so corny,” my sister said laughing.
“Yea, but he got the girl. And from the looks of it they lived as close to happily ever after as you can in modern day times,” I said picking up some more pictures.
“I guess so,” my sister said thoughtfully.
“So where are we putting these pictures?” My little sister held up a picture of my parents when they were young.
“Just put them with the ones from when they were still dating.”
“Here?” She asked adding it to the already building collage.
“Yeah that works.” I looked at the growing collage and adjusted a picture on the end. “I can’t believe they’ve been married for 25 years already.”
“Yeah, they still look so young.” She said applying glue to the back of a picture.
“Well they got married young.”
“Why how old were they when they got married?” She asked picking up my parents’ wedding picture to get a closer look at their faces.
“21 and they got engaged when they were 18… Wow they were my age. That’s scary. I’m not even remotely at that point yet. Can you imagine me engaged?”
Definitely not,” she said snorting through laughter. “But times have changed since back then. I mean Mom didn’t even consider going away to college and dad didn’t even finish.”
“That’s not true. Mom was going to go away, and then she decided not to for dad.” I corrected her. “Didn’t you ever hear the story of how they got together? Mom changed a lot of her plans for dad.”
“Really? I don’t think I would ever change my plans for a guy,” My sister said matter of factly.
“Well you might sing a different tune if you were in love. You’re too young to know what it’s like when you’re in love. Your entire life can be turned upside down.”
“Oh cause you’re such an expert on love.”
“I didn’t say I was an expert, but I’ve heard their story, and that’s enough for me to know that love is out there and I want that kind of love one day. And it couldn’t have been all bad if they’re still together 25 years later….”
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Come on it’s just a carnival. Your boyfriend is out at sea; he can’t possibly expect you to sit in every night that he is away. Just friends, Scout’s Honor,” he said holding up his three fingers.
“Were you ever even a boy scout?” she asked with a laugh.
“Well no, but I still mean it just the same,” he said blushing.
“Oh alright, but just as friends,” she said shaking her head.
“Great, I’ll pick you up at 7.” He said and scampered away with the broom before their manager came back around. She stood at the counter and pondered over what she had just agreed to. Her boyfriend, Jim, and she had been together for over a year. He was a Kings Point merchant marine and he was away at sea for six months now. She knew that he would in fact be angry and would not understand that it was just a carnival if he knew she was going out tonight, yet there was something about the eager stock boy with the floppy brown hair.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Ooh I never knew mom had another boyfriend when she met dad.” My sister said mischievously. “That adds a whole added layer to the love story.”
“Yes it does, and if you can shut up I can continue telling the story.”
“Geez I was just saying, you don’t have to be so mean about it.”
I rolled my eyes and sighed. Little sisters could be so annoying.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Janet, that kid is here to pick you up!”
“Okay daddy, I’ll be right down!” She took one last glance in the mirror. Perfect, she looked good but not too good. Just right for a girl going out with a boy as friends while her boyfriend was away. The doorbell rang.
“Good evening, Mr. Vollmer, my name is Bob Peters, is Janet ready?”
“She has a boyfriend you know. A nice, respectable military man.”
“Yes sir, I am aware of that, and I’m not trying to move in while he is away. I’m just friends with your daughter.”
“Times are changing, boys and girls going out as friends, respectable boys having their girls escorted out unsupervised behind their backs. What’s the world coming to?”
“Dad, stop! We’re just going to a carnival. Alright, good night.” She rushed down the stairs and pushed past him out the door to where Bob still stood on the front stoop. He smiled at her as they walked down the steps together and over to where his rusty blue car was parked by the curb.
“We’re meeting some of my friends there is that okay?”
“Yea sure.”
They walked into the carnival and met up with some of Bob’s friends. They decided to walk over to the Ferris wheel together and along the way she saw some huge stuffed animals.
“Aw look at those, they’re so cute!”
“Here I’ll try to win you one.”
Bob stepped up to the carnival game and paid the attendant. Then he took the basket ball and aimed for the hoop and made it on the first shot. She stood next to him jumping up and down in excitement. He took the huge stuffed animal and held it out to her. As she stood there and looked at his big blue eyes and cute dimples she felt a stirring deep inside. He was completely different from Jim; he was young, and silly, yet adorable and sweet. Jim was always so serious and methodical. He would never take her to someplace like a carnival.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“So was that it? Did she just dump the other guy and go for dad?” my sister asked engrossed in the story now. She was curled up on the floor with her head resting on her hands.
“Well it wasn’t that simple. She had been dating Jim for awhile and he was a good guy, plus grandma and grandpa loved him.”
“So what did she do?”
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
It was the senior prom and Jim was finally home from sea. He was due to pick her up any second. As she stood in front of her mirror and looked at herself, a strange feeling came over her. She hadn’t seen her boyfriend in over eight months; she should be excited to see him. But she wasn’t.
As she fixed her dress she thought about the last time she had seen him. She had been desperately in love with him. She had been practically planning the wedding back then. Now she had this unsettled feeling of uncertainty when she thought of him. He had been the more distant, non-committal one back then. More recently, however, his letters had become more serious and focused on the future. She, however, had been spending more time with Bob. They still were “just friends” but they saw each other almost every day at work and had built a wonderful connection. She was a little confused.
“Janet, Jim is here!” Her mother stood at the bottom of the stairs with the camera, and there was Jim, looking incredibly handsome in his uniform, clutching a bouquet of flowers. The prom was perfect from a superficial standpoint. Jim was the perfect date, he socialized with her friends, he paid plenty of attention to her, he danced to every slow song with her and afterwards he asked her to take a walk in the courtyard outside the prom.
It was a warm night with a clear sky. The stars shone brightly down around them. She stood by one of the benches with her back to him when he came up behind her and put one hand on her waist while he leaned over and kissed her neck.
“I’ve missed you so much.”
“Well, I missed you too,” she said turning around to face him. She stood there and looked into his warm, brown eyes.
“Can you sit down a second? I got something for you.” She spread her skirt out carefully and sat down on the bench. Then Jim got down on one knee in front of her and opened up a small velvet box.
“Janet, I’ve spent the last eight months thinking only about how soon I could get back to you. Will you please come out to Ohio with me and meet my family and agree to become my wife?” She stared at him in shock, and tried to focus on what he was saying. Ohio? Wife? What should she say?
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Wow! A proposal from another man? What did she say?” my sister asked in shock. She obviously was impressed with this new knowledge of my mother’s life.
“Well what do you think she said silly? Obviously she didn’t say yes if we’re here.”
“But how did she know? What made up her mind?” my sister demanded more details.
“She always described it as just a feeling inside. She knew that it wasn’t right. Jim just didn’t give her butterflies. And she couldn’t see herself leaving New York.”
“So when did her and dad finally get together?”
“Let me finish will you? You’re so impatient, it ruins the story.”
“Well you’re taking too long to get to the good part.”
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Seven months later she was standing on the corner of Central Park South (59th Street) near Central Park. It was a chilly, but clear evening. There was the smell of chestnuts roasting, and the festive air of Christmas in the city. There were wreaths hanging everywhere and lights in the trees. The sound of carolers in the park drifted out to the streets. She stood there, bundled up in a big coat, and smiled to herself, and then she felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned around and there was Bob standing there, smiling.
“Okay, I got the driver to give us a ride around the park. Come on, get in.” He took her hand and walked her over to a beautiful white carriage. He helped her climb in and then climbed in under the blanket next to her. As the driver pulled away from the curb it began to snow gently. They slowly drove down the street towards the entrance of Central Park. As they began to round the corner by the skating rink, Bob started searching for something under the blanket. Suddenly, he pulled out two plastic champagne glasses and a small bottle of champagne.
“How did these get under here?” He asked unconvincingly with a twinkle in his eye. She started to laugh.
“You are too much. I can’t believe you staged this all.”
“Well I wanted this to be a memorable occasion.” He popped the cork and sent it flying out into the park. He poured them two glasses and began to give a toast.
“Wait there’s something else under here.” He reached under the blanket again, and this time pulled out a small jewelry box. He held it out to her and opened the lid. She gasped and put her hand to her mouth.
“Oh Bob.” He took her hand and looked her in the eyes.
“Janet, will you marry me?”
“Oh yes, yes I will!” She always describes it as a perfect moment, topped with a perfect kiss in a carriage ride around Central park, with a plaid blanket over their legs and snow cascading down on them. She says it was a moment perfectly thought out in a loving way that would be treasured forever and often retold.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“And it has been,” My sister said.
“Yup, it’s that perfect romantic story that you never believe happens in real life.”
“I can’t believe dad really did that. It’s just so corny,” my sister said laughing.
“Yea, but he got the girl. And from the looks of it they lived as close to happily ever after as you can in modern day times,” I said picking up some more pictures.
“I guess so,” my sister said thoughtfully.
Monday, April 25, 2005
Emotions
She walked into the room and felt a chill creep up her spine. Her stomach clenched into a knot. Something did not feel right. She looked around her to see if she could see any reason for this unsettling feeling. She felt eyes on the back of her neck as if somewhere someone was watching her. She shivered and wrapped a sweater around herself as she reached for the phone.
She slammed the car door behind her as she jammed the key into the ignition. Who did he think he was? How dare he say that to her. The car engine turned over with a lurch. She quickly shifted the gearshift into reverse and slammed her foot down on the gas. SMASH!!
The sound of birds chirping drifted into the room along with a gentle, warm breeze that swept through the window. His eyes slowly opened from his cozy slumber. As he lay in bed with the sweet breeze caressing him, a smile slowly crept over his face. He rolled over and wrapped his arm around his sleeping fiancée. Today was their wedding day.
She walked into the room and felt a chill creep up her spine. Her stomach clenched into a knot. Something did not feel right. She looked around her to see if she could see any reason for this unsettling feeling. She felt eyes on the back of her neck as if somewhere someone was watching her. She shivered and wrapped a sweater around herself as she reached for the phone.
She slammed the car door behind her as she jammed the key into the ignition. Who did he think he was? How dare he say that to her. The car engine turned over with a lurch. She quickly shifted the gearshift into reverse and slammed her foot down on the gas. SMASH!!
The sound of birds chirping drifted into the room along with a gentle, warm breeze that swept through the window. His eyes slowly opened from his cozy slumber. As he lay in bed with the sweet breeze caressing him, a smile slowly crept over his face. He rolled over and wrapped his arm around his sleeping fiancée. Today was their wedding day.
Monday, April 18, 2005
“Probably”
He sat there and stacked his books on his desk while he dialed the phone. He knew that she would probably be mad at him. I mean he had said that he would call almost two weeks ago. It was just so difficult with his schedule lately. He really had been busy though. With getting ready to graduate and all of his class work and coaching hockey, and working, well he was just so exhausted by the time he got home at night that he really did usually end up cramming some school work in and collapsing in bed.
She probably thought that he was blowing her off though, or just being insensitive or distant again. She probably thought that he had gotten scared of the idea of commitment again and decided to run away. Just because he had done that in the past didn’t mean that he’d always be that way. He had told her that, but he probably really had kind of not exemplified that this time. He meant to be different and put more effort in this time.
The thing he hated though is that even though they had agreed to just take things slow this time and be casual and see where things led, he knew that she was still probably wanting more and expecting phone calls almost every day, and that she probably wanted him to try and come up and see her on weekends. Even though she said that she wanted things to be casual right now also, and that she wasn’t ready to jump into another relationship, he had seen the look in her eyes when she laid there in his arms. She had had that whole dreamy look, that “I want you to be my boyfriend” look.
Oh god here it goes, the phone was ringing. Alright be cool man, just say hey and that you’re sorry you didn’t call sooner…
“Hello”
“Hey, it’s me.”
“Oh hey what’s up?”
“I’m soo sorry I haven’t called you sooner, I’ve just been so crazy busy the last two weeks, school’s been crazy and I’ve been coaching hockey three times a week, and my boss kept calling me in to work extra shifts, and well yea, so I really have meant to call you sooner..”
“Don’t worry bout it, seriously, its ok.. I’ve been really busy too. We said this was casual this time. It’s ok. It’s just good to hear from you now. So what’s been going on?”
He sat there and stacked his books on his desk while he dialed the phone. He knew that she would probably be mad at him. I mean he had said that he would call almost two weeks ago. It was just so difficult with his schedule lately. He really had been busy though. With getting ready to graduate and all of his class work and coaching hockey, and working, well he was just so exhausted by the time he got home at night that he really did usually end up cramming some school work in and collapsing in bed.
She probably thought that he was blowing her off though, or just being insensitive or distant again. She probably thought that he had gotten scared of the idea of commitment again and decided to run away. Just because he had done that in the past didn’t mean that he’d always be that way. He had told her that, but he probably really had kind of not exemplified that this time. He meant to be different and put more effort in this time.
The thing he hated though is that even though they had agreed to just take things slow this time and be casual and see where things led, he knew that she was still probably wanting more and expecting phone calls almost every day, and that she probably wanted him to try and come up and see her on weekends. Even though she said that she wanted things to be casual right now also, and that she wasn’t ready to jump into another relationship, he had seen the look in her eyes when she laid there in his arms. She had had that whole dreamy look, that “I want you to be my boyfriend” look.
Oh god here it goes, the phone was ringing. Alright be cool man, just say hey and that you’re sorry you didn’t call sooner…
“Hello”
“Hey, it’s me.”
“Oh hey what’s up?”
“I’m soo sorry I haven’t called you sooner, I’ve just been so crazy busy the last two weeks, school’s been crazy and I’ve been coaching hockey three times a week, and my boss kept calling me in to work extra shifts, and well yea, so I really have meant to call you sooner..”
“Don’t worry bout it, seriously, its ok.. I’ve been really busy too. We said this was casual this time. It’s ok. It’s just good to hear from you now. So what’s been going on?”
Tuesday, April 12, 2005
Childhood Memory
Lyssie’s coming over tonight! I love it when she comes over, we always get to play fun games and dress up. Ooh there’s the doorbell.
“Hi. Quick come look! My mommy got me some new dress up clothes we can play with.”
“Oh goody!” We ran upstairs and started going through the pile. Alyssa pulled out the Cinderella dress and began to hold it up to herself. I quickly grabbed it back from her.
“No, that one’s mine.”
“Well you can share can’t you? You get to wear it all the time.”
“No, I’m Cinderella, you can be everyone else.”
“You’re always Cinderella.”
“Too bad, it’s my house and we can play how I want to or you can’t wear any of the clothes.”
“Fine, it’s more fun being all the other characters anyway.”
We put on the clothes and began to dance around making up our story for the day.
It was one of the first really cold days that November, and my dad loved making fires in the fireplace when it got cold. My mom was popping popcorn and getting out board games for the family to play together around the fire. She was also trying to do some laundry in the laundry room. Lyssie and I went dancing through the kitchen twirling to show my parents our pretty outfits. My dad finished building the fire and closed the glass doors. Then he picked up the newspaper and went back to his big recliner chair to settle in.
“Ooh look Lyssie, there’s a fire in the fireplace, now we really can pretend to be Cinderella.” The two of us gathered by the fire and couldn’t stop looking at the dancing flames. Lyssie reached forward and touched the glass. Then she suddenly began doing this funny dance jumping up and down running around the house holding her finger. I was still too interested in the dancing flames to really pay attention to her. I reached forward and touched the glass myself. Then this horrible tingling took over my finger. Oh my god it hurt! I clutched my finger with my other hand and began running around after Lyssie. Then I began to cry. Oh it hurt so bad! My mom came running out of the laundry room to see what all the noise was about. I ran to her and buried my face in her stomach.
“Oh mommy, my finger hurts!”
“What happened?”
“We were playing Cinderella and we touched the fire.”
“You silly girls, the glass gets hot when it’s over the fire.”
She took us by the wrists and walked us over to the sink. She then put both our hands under cold water. Finally, the tingling began to feel numb and go away. She took us upstairs and put some funny smelling cream on our fingers and wrapped them up with band aids. Then we all went back downstairs where the popcorn was ready. Then we all sat down around the table in the den and played Candy land.
Lyssie’s coming over tonight! I love it when she comes over, we always get to play fun games and dress up. Ooh there’s the doorbell.
“Hi. Quick come look! My mommy got me some new dress up clothes we can play with.”
“Oh goody!” We ran upstairs and started going through the pile. Alyssa pulled out the Cinderella dress and began to hold it up to herself. I quickly grabbed it back from her.
“No, that one’s mine.”
“Well you can share can’t you? You get to wear it all the time.”
“No, I’m Cinderella, you can be everyone else.”
“You’re always Cinderella.”
“Too bad, it’s my house and we can play how I want to or you can’t wear any of the clothes.”
“Fine, it’s more fun being all the other characters anyway.”
We put on the clothes and began to dance around making up our story for the day.
It was one of the first really cold days that November, and my dad loved making fires in the fireplace when it got cold. My mom was popping popcorn and getting out board games for the family to play together around the fire. She was also trying to do some laundry in the laundry room. Lyssie and I went dancing through the kitchen twirling to show my parents our pretty outfits. My dad finished building the fire and closed the glass doors. Then he picked up the newspaper and went back to his big recliner chair to settle in.
“Ooh look Lyssie, there’s a fire in the fireplace, now we really can pretend to be Cinderella.” The two of us gathered by the fire and couldn’t stop looking at the dancing flames. Lyssie reached forward and touched the glass. Then she suddenly began doing this funny dance jumping up and down running around the house holding her finger. I was still too interested in the dancing flames to really pay attention to her. I reached forward and touched the glass myself. Then this horrible tingling took over my finger. Oh my god it hurt! I clutched my finger with my other hand and began running around after Lyssie. Then I began to cry. Oh it hurt so bad! My mom came running out of the laundry room to see what all the noise was about. I ran to her and buried my face in her stomach.
“Oh mommy, my finger hurts!”
“What happened?”
“We were playing Cinderella and we touched the fire.”
“You silly girls, the glass gets hot when it’s over the fire.”
She took us by the wrists and walked us over to the sink. She then put both our hands under cold water. Finally, the tingling began to feel numb and go away. She took us upstairs and put some funny smelling cream on our fingers and wrapped them up with band aids. Then we all went back downstairs where the popcorn was ready. Then we all sat down around the table in the den and played Candy land.
Monday, April 04, 2005
Fixed up version for my second draft- comments appreciated Thanks!
Katie sat at her computer typing a paper when the phone began to ring behind her. She got up and walked across the room to answer it.
“Hello.”
“Hi.”
“Oh hey babe. What’s going on?” she asked.
“We need to talk. There’s been a lot on my mind. I think we need some space for awhile,” a man’s voice answered.
“What? Richard, why?” Katie began to whimper.
“Wait shh babe, don’t cry, let me explain. I just have a list of reasons and concerns I need to discuss with you. I think our relationship has reached a crossroads, we’re a little bit different and I just have some conditions for you to consider for us to stay together, that’s all” Richard answered.
“What type of conditions? I’m so confused,” Katie sputtered sitting down on the bed.
“You’re not going to like all of these, but they’re important to me; important for us” Richard said.
“Just tell me and let me decide that. I don’t want us to break up so I’ll listen with an open mind, I promise,” Katie said.
“I knew you would. Okay, well, first and foremost I want us to repent for our sins. I want to be your spiritual advisor and guide you down the path to righteousness,” he answered.
Katie stared at the phone in shock.
“Where the fuck is this coming from? What sins? I mean I know I’m not perfect, but I don’t really seem to remember straying off the path of righteousness,” she responded. Katie sat Indian style on her bed holding a pillow to her stomach, clutching the phone in her hand with white knuckles.
“Stop cursing, I’ve told you before its unladylike and I don’t like it,” he sighed and continued. “I want you to finally know me for the real me. Before I met you I didn’t believe in premarital sex. Then I gave up my morals for you. I want us to repent for that sin we committed. I want us to be born again virgins until marriage. In fact, until marriage I want us to give up lust completely. No lustful actions at all, except for kissing, and no lustful thoughts. Lust is one of the seven deadly sins and I don’t want to think of my wife in a lustful way. I want you to be wholesome,” Richard proclaimed, shuffling through his papers.
Katie sat there listening to him in shock. Who was this man? She had been dating him for the last six months, yet as he spoke to her now with his lists and his Bible, preaching to her about repenting and spiritual advisors, she realized she didn’t know him at all. This was definitely not the man she had fallen in love with.
“Do you want me standing there like Betty Crocker with a Bible in my apron pocket, barefoot and pregnant? This is ridiculous, Richard. No lustful thoughts? No lustful actions until marriage? That’s not even realistic. And I never forced you to give up your morals. You chose to sleep with me. I never tied you to the bed and made you,” Katie argued.
He spoke with such a bitter tone in his voice. There suddenly was no emotion there. It was scary.
“Katie you don’t get it. I can’t love you until you accept these conditions. I thought I loved you, but now I realize I can only say I care about you, because you’re not what I need you to be yet. I need us to view the Bible the same way and turn to it for answers to our spiritual questions. I need you to view moral issues the same way I do. Right now you’re still a baby killer because you believe in abortion,” he said.
“A baby killer?!? What the hell? I never said I would have one, I just said that a woman had the right to choose. And what the hell does that make you? You’re in the military for Chrissakes!!” Katie interrupted angrily.
“Please do not use the lord’s name in vain,” he said with an eerie sense of calmness. “And that is different. I’m giving back to our country. I’m doing it for honor. Here let me read these Bible passages to you and try to make you see the error of your ways,” Richard reprimanded.
“Richard, you know I don’t view the Bible the same way as you. It’s not a literal text, it’s there for reference…” she started to say, then he cut her off,
“Can’t you just sit there and listen for a second? I’m trying to prove a point to you. The answers are right here.” He began to read from the Bible.
Katie’s mind was racing a mile a minute. Who was he? How could he turn all of his emotions off like a light switch? And why was he saying that she had to change? Why was she automatically the wrong one? This was not Richard.
Just earlier today he had been joking around on the phone with her about getting a cat together. She was allergic to certain cats, yet for some reason she was not allergic to her roommate’s. So he had been saying he’d take her to the animal shelter and hold up all the cats in her face until they found one she was okay with. And now this? Now he couldn’t love her until she met his conditions? That was not love. Love had no conditions, that’s why they called it unconditional. It was supposed to be a give and take relationship, with compromises. Where were the compromises? She slightly tuned back in to listen to him, he was droning on now about condemning premarital sex, wait and homosexuality? She was immediately jerked back from her thoughts. Her godmother was gay and he knew that.
“Wait were you just saying that you condemn homosexuals?” she cut in.
“I do not condemn homosexuals, I just condemn their actions. They’re sinners in the eyes of God,” he replied. Her stomach began to heave. She had never been so consumed with feelings of love and hate at the same time. She thought she loved this man, yet at the moment all she could feel were feelings of repulsion by him.
“How could you say that? God created them the way they are, how could He then condemn them for acting out the way they are?” she asked.
“He might have created them that way, but to be true Christians, they are supposed to overcome their lustful cravings and become stronger because of these cravings by denying them and staying on the path of righteousness.” He responded.
“So you’re saying that they’re just supposed to spend their whole lives being miserable and denying their true identities? I somehow find it hard to believe that that was God’s intent for them.” Katie responded bitterly throwing a pillow off the bed at the wall, wishing he was there so she could hit him.
“See this is what I mean,” He frantically flipped through the pages and began to read from another Bible passage about two yolks bouncing off each other. “I interpret this passage to mean that a Christian is not supposed to marry a non- Christian, they’d never mesh,” he angrily stated. He took a deep breath and continued quietly, “What I’m basically trying to say Katie, is that although, you’re supposedly a Christian, we believe in two different Gods, that is why I cannot love you or marry you until you accept my God.”
“Just because I do not want to believe that God is a Zeus- like figure sitting up on a throne with a lightning bolt waiting to strike us down if we do not follow His rules and regulations for getting into the pearly white gates, does not make me any less of a Christian than you. I’m sorry if I’d rather believe that God is a caring and benevolent soul that accepts and loves us as long as we try to be good and caring people and live the best lives we can,” she choked out with tears running down her face. She began to reach to her night table to grab for tissues.
“Ugh whatever, you’re not seeing reason. There’s punishment for your actions!” he sputtered out.
“But I don’t believe my actions or beliefs are wrong. Can’t you understand that? This is who I am. It’s okay that we don’t believe the same thing, we can find a common ground, and try to be open-minded to learn from each other’s beliefs,” she said tearfully.
“That’s not how it works Katie!” he sighed exasperated. “I think I need space for awhile. I just can’t be with you right now. I need you to evaluate yourself and to agree with me. I can’t be with someone that doesn’t believe what I believe. I need you to start your path to discovery; confess your sins to your friends and family. I’ll check back on you in a week or so and see about your progress. If you can see the error of your ways, maybe then we can be together. Otherwise right now I just really cannot see how I can be with you,” Richard said.
Katie began to weep into the phone quietly. He sat there silently listening to her for a moment then he cleared his throat and began to speak again, “I do care about you Katie, and I do want to be with you, that’s why I’m trying to save you. I just need you to see what I see.” Then he hung up the phone.
Katie sat there listening to the dial tone buzzing in her ear for awhile. Then she finally hung up the phone. She sat there twisting the tissue in her hands. Then she wiped the wet tears from under her eyes and took a deep breath. Finally, she stood up and walked to her computer. She scrolled through her play list, hit a selection and turned up the volume. The song ‘Every Rose Has it’s Thorn’ came blaring from the speakers. Then she slowly began to take down the pictures of the two of them down from her walls. She already knew her answer for him. She wasn’t changing herself for anyone.
Katie sat at her computer typing a paper when the phone began to ring behind her. She got up and walked across the room to answer it.
“Hello.”
“Hi.”
“Oh hey babe. What’s going on?” she asked.
“We need to talk. There’s been a lot on my mind. I think we need some space for awhile,” a man’s voice answered.
“What? Richard, why?” Katie began to whimper.
“Wait shh babe, don’t cry, let me explain. I just have a list of reasons and concerns I need to discuss with you. I think our relationship has reached a crossroads, we’re a little bit different and I just have some conditions for you to consider for us to stay together, that’s all” Richard answered.
“What type of conditions? I’m so confused,” Katie sputtered sitting down on the bed.
“You’re not going to like all of these, but they’re important to me; important for us” Richard said.
“Just tell me and let me decide that. I don’t want us to break up so I’ll listen with an open mind, I promise,” Katie said.
“I knew you would. Okay, well, first and foremost I want us to repent for our sins. I want to be your spiritual advisor and guide you down the path to righteousness,” he answered.
Katie stared at the phone in shock.
“Where the fuck is this coming from? What sins? I mean I know I’m not perfect, but I don’t really seem to remember straying off the path of righteousness,” she responded. Katie sat Indian style on her bed holding a pillow to her stomach, clutching the phone in her hand with white knuckles.
“Stop cursing, I’ve told you before its unladylike and I don’t like it,” he sighed and continued. “I want you to finally know me for the real me. Before I met you I didn’t believe in premarital sex. Then I gave up my morals for you. I want us to repent for that sin we committed. I want us to be born again virgins until marriage. In fact, until marriage I want us to give up lust completely. No lustful actions at all, except for kissing, and no lustful thoughts. Lust is one of the seven deadly sins and I don’t want to think of my wife in a lustful way. I want you to be wholesome,” Richard proclaimed, shuffling through his papers.
Katie sat there listening to him in shock. Who was this man? She had been dating him for the last six months, yet as he spoke to her now with his lists and his Bible, preaching to her about repenting and spiritual advisors, she realized she didn’t know him at all. This was definitely not the man she had fallen in love with.
“Do you want me standing there like Betty Crocker with a Bible in my apron pocket, barefoot and pregnant? This is ridiculous, Richard. No lustful thoughts? No lustful actions until marriage? That’s not even realistic. And I never forced you to give up your morals. You chose to sleep with me. I never tied you to the bed and made you,” Katie argued.
He spoke with such a bitter tone in his voice. There suddenly was no emotion there. It was scary.
“Katie you don’t get it. I can’t love you until you accept these conditions. I thought I loved you, but now I realize I can only say I care about you, because you’re not what I need you to be yet. I need us to view the Bible the same way and turn to it for answers to our spiritual questions. I need you to view moral issues the same way I do. Right now you’re still a baby killer because you believe in abortion,” he said.
“A baby killer?!? What the hell? I never said I would have one, I just said that a woman had the right to choose. And what the hell does that make you? You’re in the military for Chrissakes!!” Katie interrupted angrily.
“Please do not use the lord’s name in vain,” he said with an eerie sense of calmness. “And that is different. I’m giving back to our country. I’m doing it for honor. Here let me read these Bible passages to you and try to make you see the error of your ways,” Richard reprimanded.
“Richard, you know I don’t view the Bible the same way as you. It’s not a literal text, it’s there for reference…” she started to say, then he cut her off,
“Can’t you just sit there and listen for a second? I’m trying to prove a point to you. The answers are right here.” He began to read from the Bible.
Katie’s mind was racing a mile a minute. Who was he? How could he turn all of his emotions off like a light switch? And why was he saying that she had to change? Why was she automatically the wrong one? This was not Richard.
Just earlier today he had been joking around on the phone with her about getting a cat together. She was allergic to certain cats, yet for some reason she was not allergic to her roommate’s. So he had been saying he’d take her to the animal shelter and hold up all the cats in her face until they found one she was okay with. And now this? Now he couldn’t love her until she met his conditions? That was not love. Love had no conditions, that’s why they called it unconditional. It was supposed to be a give and take relationship, with compromises. Where were the compromises? She slightly tuned back in to listen to him, he was droning on now about condemning premarital sex, wait and homosexuality? She was immediately jerked back from her thoughts. Her godmother was gay and he knew that.
“Wait were you just saying that you condemn homosexuals?” she cut in.
“I do not condemn homosexuals, I just condemn their actions. They’re sinners in the eyes of God,” he replied. Her stomach began to heave. She had never been so consumed with feelings of love and hate at the same time. She thought she loved this man, yet at the moment all she could feel were feelings of repulsion by him.
“How could you say that? God created them the way they are, how could He then condemn them for acting out the way they are?” she asked.
“He might have created them that way, but to be true Christians, they are supposed to overcome their lustful cravings and become stronger because of these cravings by denying them and staying on the path of righteousness.” He responded.
“So you’re saying that they’re just supposed to spend their whole lives being miserable and denying their true identities? I somehow find it hard to believe that that was God’s intent for them.” Katie responded bitterly throwing a pillow off the bed at the wall, wishing he was there so she could hit him.
“See this is what I mean,” He frantically flipped through the pages and began to read from another Bible passage about two yolks bouncing off each other. “I interpret this passage to mean that a Christian is not supposed to marry a non- Christian, they’d never mesh,” he angrily stated. He took a deep breath and continued quietly, “What I’m basically trying to say Katie, is that although, you’re supposedly a Christian, we believe in two different Gods, that is why I cannot love you or marry you until you accept my God.”
“Just because I do not want to believe that God is a Zeus- like figure sitting up on a throne with a lightning bolt waiting to strike us down if we do not follow His rules and regulations for getting into the pearly white gates, does not make me any less of a Christian than you. I’m sorry if I’d rather believe that God is a caring and benevolent soul that accepts and loves us as long as we try to be good and caring people and live the best lives we can,” she choked out with tears running down her face. She began to reach to her night table to grab for tissues.
“Ugh whatever, you’re not seeing reason. There’s punishment for your actions!” he sputtered out.
“But I don’t believe my actions or beliefs are wrong. Can’t you understand that? This is who I am. It’s okay that we don’t believe the same thing, we can find a common ground, and try to be open-minded to learn from each other’s beliefs,” she said tearfully.
“That’s not how it works Katie!” he sighed exasperated. “I think I need space for awhile. I just can’t be with you right now. I need you to evaluate yourself and to agree with me. I can’t be with someone that doesn’t believe what I believe. I need you to start your path to discovery; confess your sins to your friends and family. I’ll check back on you in a week or so and see about your progress. If you can see the error of your ways, maybe then we can be together. Otherwise right now I just really cannot see how I can be with you,” Richard said.
Katie began to weep into the phone quietly. He sat there silently listening to her for a moment then he cleared his throat and began to speak again, “I do care about you Katie, and I do want to be with you, that’s why I’m trying to save you. I just need you to see what I see.” Then he hung up the phone.
Katie sat there listening to the dial tone buzzing in her ear for awhile. Then she finally hung up the phone. She sat there twisting the tissue in her hands. Then she wiped the wet tears from under her eyes and took a deep breath. Finally, she stood up and walked to her computer. She scrolled through her play list, hit a selection and turned up the volume. The song ‘Every Rose Has it’s Thorn’ came blaring from the speakers. Then she slowly began to take down the pictures of the two of them down from her walls. She already knew her answer for him. She wasn’t changing herself for anyone.
Tuesday, March 29, 2005
“We need to repent for our sins. I want to be your spiritual advisor and guide you down the path to righteousness.”
“What? What sins? I mean I know I’m not perfect, but I don’t really seem to remember straying off the path of righteousness.”
Katie sat on her bed looking up at Richard incredulously. Who was this man? She had been dating him for the last six months, yet as he stood over her now with his lists and his Bible, preaching to her about repenting and spiritual advisors, she realized she didn’t know him at all. This was definitely not the man she had fallen in love with.
“I want you to finally know me for the real me. Before I met you I didn’t believe in premarital sex. Then I gave up my morals for you. I want us to repent for that sin we committed. I want us to be born again virgins until marriage. In fact, until marriage I want us to give up lust completely. No lustful actions at all, except for kissing, and no lustful thoughts. Lust is one of the seven deadly sins and I don’t want to think of my wife in a lustful way. I want you to be wholesome,” Richard proclaimed, shuffling through his papers. Katie sat there staring at him in shock.
“Do you want me standing there like Betty Crocker with a Bible in my apron pocket, barefoot and pregnant? This is ridiculous, Richard. No lustful thoughts? No lustful actions until marriage? That’s not even realistic. And I never forced you to give up your morals. You chose to sleep with me. I never tied you to the bed and made you,” Katie argued. She looked at him and saw the strangest look in his eyes. There was no emotion there. It was scary, and he spoke with such a bitter tone in his voice.
“Katie you don’t get it. I can’t love you until you accept these conditions. I thought I loved you, but now I realize I can only say I care about you, because you’re not what I need you to be yet. I need us to view the Bible the same way and turn to it for answers to our spiritual questions. I need you to view moral issues the same way I do. Right now you’re still a baby killer because you believe in abortion,” he said pacing across the room.
“A baby killer?!? What the hell? I never said I would have one, I just said that a woman had the right to choose. And what the hell does that make you? You’re in the military for Chrissakes!!” Katie interrupted angrily. He whirled around to stare at her.
“Please do not use the lord’s name in vain. And that is different. I’m giving back to our country. I’m doing it for honor. Here let me read these Bible passages to you and try to make you see the error of your ways,” Richard reprimanded. He began to read from the Bible. Katie’s mind was racing a mile a minute. Who was he? How could he turn all of his emotions off like a light switch? This was not Richard. Just earlier today he had been joking around on the phone with her about getting a cat together. She was allergic to certain cats, yet for some reason she was not allergic to her roommate’s. So he had been saying he’d take her to the animal shelter and hold up all the cats in her face until they found one she was okay with. And now this? Now he couldn’t love her until she met his conditions? That was not love. Love had no conditions, that’s why they call it unconditional. She slightly tuned back in to listen to him, he was droning on now about condemning premarital sex, wait and homosexuality? She immediately jerked around. Her godmother was gay and he knew that.
“Wait were you just saying that you condemn homosexuals?” she asked.
“I do not condemn homosexuals, I just condemn their actions. They’re sinners in the eyes of God,” he replied. Her stomach began to heave. She had never been so consumed with feelings of love and hate at the same time. She thought she loved this man, yet at the moment all she could feel were feelings of repulsion by him.
“How could you say that? God created them the way they are, how could He then condemn them for acting out the way they are?” she asked.
“He might have created them that way, but to be true Christians, they are supposed to overcome their lustful cravings and become stronger because of these cravings by denying them and staying on the path of righteousness.” He responded.
“So you’re saying that they’re just supposed to spend their whole lives being miserable and denying their true identities? I somehow find it hard to believe that that was God’s intent for them.” Katie responded bitterly throwing a pillow off the bed at him. It missed him and bounced off the wall behind him.
“See this is what I mean,” He frantically flipped through the pages and began to read from another Bible passage about two yolks bouncing off each other. “I interpret this passage to mean that a Christian is not supposed to marry a non- Christian, they’d never mesh. Although, you’re supposedly a Christian, we believe in two different Gods, that is why I cannot love you or marry you until you accept my God,” he angrily stated, waving the Bible in her face.
“Just because I do not want to believe that God is a Zeus- like figure sitting up on a throne with a lightning bolt waiting to strike us down if we do not follow his rules and regulations for getting into the pearly white gates, does not make me any less of a Christian than you. I’m sorry if I’d rather believe that God is a caring and benevolent soul that accepts and loves us as long as we try to be good and caring people and live the best lives we can,” she choked out with tears running down her face.
“Ugh whatever,” he sputtered out exasperated. “I need space for awhile. I just can’t be with you right now. I need you to evaluate yourself. Start your path to discovery; confess your sins to your friends and family. I’ll check back on you in a week or so and see about your progress. If you can see the error of your ways, maybe then we can be together. Otherwise right now I just really cannot see how I can be with you,” Richard said and turned for the door. Then he looked back to where she was sitting on the bed, “I do care about you Katie, and I do want to be with you, that’s why I’m trying to save you. I just need you to see what I see.” Then he opened the door and left.
Katie sat there in shock trying to accept everything he had said. Finally, she stood up and walked to her computer. She scrolled through her play list, hit a selection and turned up the volume. The song ‘Every Rose Has it’s Thorn’ came blaring from the speakers. Then she turned back to her bed and collapsed on top of it and began to cry into her pillow.
“What? What sins? I mean I know I’m not perfect, but I don’t really seem to remember straying off the path of righteousness.”
Katie sat on her bed looking up at Richard incredulously. Who was this man? She had been dating him for the last six months, yet as he stood over her now with his lists and his Bible, preaching to her about repenting and spiritual advisors, she realized she didn’t know him at all. This was definitely not the man she had fallen in love with.
“I want you to finally know me for the real me. Before I met you I didn’t believe in premarital sex. Then I gave up my morals for you. I want us to repent for that sin we committed. I want us to be born again virgins until marriage. In fact, until marriage I want us to give up lust completely. No lustful actions at all, except for kissing, and no lustful thoughts. Lust is one of the seven deadly sins and I don’t want to think of my wife in a lustful way. I want you to be wholesome,” Richard proclaimed, shuffling through his papers. Katie sat there staring at him in shock.
“Do you want me standing there like Betty Crocker with a Bible in my apron pocket, barefoot and pregnant? This is ridiculous, Richard. No lustful thoughts? No lustful actions until marriage? That’s not even realistic. And I never forced you to give up your morals. You chose to sleep with me. I never tied you to the bed and made you,” Katie argued. She looked at him and saw the strangest look in his eyes. There was no emotion there. It was scary, and he spoke with such a bitter tone in his voice.
“Katie you don’t get it. I can’t love you until you accept these conditions. I thought I loved you, but now I realize I can only say I care about you, because you’re not what I need you to be yet. I need us to view the Bible the same way and turn to it for answers to our spiritual questions. I need you to view moral issues the same way I do. Right now you’re still a baby killer because you believe in abortion,” he said pacing across the room.
“A baby killer?!? What the hell? I never said I would have one, I just said that a woman had the right to choose. And what the hell does that make you? You’re in the military for Chrissakes!!” Katie interrupted angrily. He whirled around to stare at her.
“Please do not use the lord’s name in vain. And that is different. I’m giving back to our country. I’m doing it for honor. Here let me read these Bible passages to you and try to make you see the error of your ways,” Richard reprimanded. He began to read from the Bible. Katie’s mind was racing a mile a minute. Who was he? How could he turn all of his emotions off like a light switch? This was not Richard. Just earlier today he had been joking around on the phone with her about getting a cat together. She was allergic to certain cats, yet for some reason she was not allergic to her roommate’s. So he had been saying he’d take her to the animal shelter and hold up all the cats in her face until they found one she was okay with. And now this? Now he couldn’t love her until she met his conditions? That was not love. Love had no conditions, that’s why they call it unconditional. She slightly tuned back in to listen to him, he was droning on now about condemning premarital sex, wait and homosexuality? She immediately jerked around. Her godmother was gay and he knew that.
“Wait were you just saying that you condemn homosexuals?” she asked.
“I do not condemn homosexuals, I just condemn their actions. They’re sinners in the eyes of God,” he replied. Her stomach began to heave. She had never been so consumed with feelings of love and hate at the same time. She thought she loved this man, yet at the moment all she could feel were feelings of repulsion by him.
“How could you say that? God created them the way they are, how could He then condemn them for acting out the way they are?” she asked.
“He might have created them that way, but to be true Christians, they are supposed to overcome their lustful cravings and become stronger because of these cravings by denying them and staying on the path of righteousness.” He responded.
“So you’re saying that they’re just supposed to spend their whole lives being miserable and denying their true identities? I somehow find it hard to believe that that was God’s intent for them.” Katie responded bitterly throwing a pillow off the bed at him. It missed him and bounced off the wall behind him.
“See this is what I mean,” He frantically flipped through the pages and began to read from another Bible passage about two yolks bouncing off each other. “I interpret this passage to mean that a Christian is not supposed to marry a non- Christian, they’d never mesh. Although, you’re supposedly a Christian, we believe in two different Gods, that is why I cannot love you or marry you until you accept my God,” he angrily stated, waving the Bible in her face.
“Just because I do not want to believe that God is a Zeus- like figure sitting up on a throne with a lightning bolt waiting to strike us down if we do not follow his rules and regulations for getting into the pearly white gates, does not make me any less of a Christian than you. I’m sorry if I’d rather believe that God is a caring and benevolent soul that accepts and loves us as long as we try to be good and caring people and live the best lives we can,” she choked out with tears running down her face.
“Ugh whatever,” he sputtered out exasperated. “I need space for awhile. I just can’t be with you right now. I need you to evaluate yourself. Start your path to discovery; confess your sins to your friends and family. I’ll check back on you in a week or so and see about your progress. If you can see the error of your ways, maybe then we can be together. Otherwise right now I just really cannot see how I can be with you,” Richard said and turned for the door. Then he looked back to where she was sitting on the bed, “I do care about you Katie, and I do want to be with you, that’s why I’m trying to save you. I just need you to see what I see.” Then he opened the door and left.
Katie sat there in shock trying to accept everything he had said. Finally, she stood up and walked to her computer. She scrolled through her play list, hit a selection and turned up the volume. The song ‘Every Rose Has it’s Thorn’ came blaring from the speakers. Then she turned back to her bed and collapsed on top of it and began to cry into her pillow.
